Castiel Learns!
by whovianfangirl
Summary: A series of one-shots based around our favorite angel, as he learns things about the human world he didn't know before! Rated T for cursing.
1. Lesson One: Texting!

Lesson One;

Castiel Learns About Texting!

Castiel had his phone for awhile now, and finally learned how to make calls and leave messages. Then one day he got a text from Dean.

Castiel's phone buzzed once in his pocket. He though that was unusual, because it normally buzzed about eight times when someone called.

He pulled it out and flipped it open. He raised his brows at the little screen which said, New Message. A little white envelope was displayed and was opening and closing. Confused, Castiel clicked on it.

_Hey Cas, U figure out hw 2 txt yet?_

Castiel was suprised. His eyebrows furrowed, and concentrated on the screen. How had Dean left this type of message? What was it? He tore his eyes away from his phone. He looked up at the sky, as if the clouds knew the answers. What was with his awful grammar? Did he always write like that? These questions and more swirled around in the angel's head, leaving him with no answers.

He sighed, and looked back at the black phone in his hand. Dean's message was still displayed, and underneath it there was a 'reply' tab. Curiously he clicked it, wondering how he could reply to a 'txt'.

He rubbed the back of his neck in exasperation when a blank white screen popped up. A small black line appeared in the top left hand corner.

He didn't know what to do, so he started pressing buttons.

"Oh!" He gasped when letters appeared on the screen. It was gibberish nonsense, but at least now he knew somewhat what to do.

_Dhsldj:&)2!8hdjs NoIdontthinksoDean_

Still frowning, he clicked the send button and waited for a response. Soon the 'New Message' popped up again.

_K...Well let's jst stck 2 calls 4rm nw on. Or til I teach u hw 2 txt. Whatever._

Castiel nodded, typing in

_OkayThatsoundsfine._

Castiel flipped his phone shut and returned it to his pocket.

"I don't think I like 'txt'." He said.

* * *

Dean started laughing as he put his phone up. He called to Sam, who was in the bathroom brushing his teeth.

"Sam! Sammy!"

"Mhat?" He poked his head out of the bathroom, a toothbrush in his mouth.

"Castiel! An angel of the lord-" His own laughter cut him off, and he clutched his stomach, face red from the laughing.

Sam rolled his eyes and finished brushing his teeth.

'I wonder what Dean did to Cas this time.' He thought.

**Lesson one finished! :3 Hope ya'll liked it! And if you guys have any ideas or something you want to see our favorite little angel learn, leave a review or PM me! I love new ideas! **

**Bye for now! See you next lesson, in which Cas learns about human music from an unlikely source!**


	2. Lesson Two: Dubstep?

Castiel Learns!

Lesson Two: Dupstep?

It was six thirty in the afternoon, and Castiel had just stepped into a bar. His trenchcoat flapped sort of gracefully around him as he made his was to a table in the back, his usual unreadable mask on. The angel's eyes swept the place scornfully, and he wondered why Dean liked these places so much.

It smelled like sex and beer. And with his angelic senses it was just a bit overwhelming. People where laughing, talking, and basically having fun.

"Excuse me?" Castiel looked up to see a ample amount of cleavage attached to a woman. She had a painfully fake smile, and was holding an empty tray and a small notebook.

"What would you like?" It was obvious she was attracted to him, so he glared at her, hoping she would take the hint.

"Nothing, I'm waiting for someone." He said. The waitress' nodded, her face dropping in disappointment.

"Oh, okay. Well, just call if you need anything!" She smiled and walked away.

Then Castiel was tapped on the back of the head.

"Good to see you, Cas."

Sam slipped in on the opposite side of the booth, grinning.

Castiel nodded. "Yes, it is. So what did you need?"

Sam had called the angel earlier that day, unbeknownst to Dean, and Sam had asked Castiel to meet him at this bar.

"Oh, nothing! What's wrong with wanting to have a drink with a friend?" Sam waved a waitress over and ordered some drinks.

Castiel stared at him suspiciously. "Nothing, Sam...But what's the real reason you called me?"

Sam's face suddenly got serious, and he leaned forward. "What do you know about music, Cas?"

"Music?" He was not expecting that. "Well...I...hymns? And praises to Father." Sam had caught him off guard.

"Is that all? Don't you know any other types of music?"

Castiel shook his head. "Lucifer was the angel of music, so angels only have the hymns he composed in heaven. Our Father wanted us to sing praises to Him."

Sam chuckled, "Of course he would be the angel of music. Anyway, what do you think about our music?" He paused, then added, "Us humans, I mean."

Castiel thought for a moment.

"I've heard it, but I've never listened to it. Sometimes it sounds awful." He frowned, thinking of some perverted songs.

"Haha!" Sam laughed, thanking the waitress as she brought the drinks. He took a gulp then slammed the glass down on the table.

"I know. But not all of it. I kinda like this kind of music called dubstep."

Castiel cocked his head. "What's dupstep?"

Sam reached into his pocket and pulled out a simple MP3 player. "Here. I bought this for you and downloaded some of my favorites."

After Sam showed the angel how to use the MP3, he got up.

"This was fun, and I'd love to stay, but if I don't go soon Dean is going to get pissed." The hunter threw some crumbled bills on the table, started for the door, then stopped and turned around.

"Don't tell Dean it was me."

"I won't."

And with that he nodded and was out the door, Castiel soon following. He disliked bars.

* * *

Dean was just about to get up to find his brother when Sam walked through the door.

"Sam! Where have you been?" He frowned.

Sam just grinned at him, then sat down on his bed.

"I just gave Cas a MP3."

Dean nodded. "Okay. What was on it?"

"Dupstep."

"No. No you didn't. Please, tell me you didn't." Dean groaned, putting his arm over his eyes.

Sam just started laughing, "I did!"

"Son of a bitch! That's not music! Why would you do that? What if he likes it?" He was concerned his brother had corrupted Castiel.

* * *

Castiel put the earphones in carefully, and he pressed the play button on his MP3. His eyes widened and he stared at the little MP3 player. His head involuntarily started to bob to the music, and he felt a strange lightness.

He liked dupstep.

_**End of lesson two! :3 Hoped you liked it. As always, reviews are welcome! **_


	3. Lesson Three: Pie

Castiel Learns!

Lesson Three: Pie

Dean, Sam and Castiel had just finished a job together and decided to go a local diner to celebrate. They had been seated and Sam and Dean where looking over the menus.

Dean noticed the angel wasn't looking at a menu. "Hey, Cas." The angel looked up at him.

"Yes Dean?"

The hunter pointed to the menu in front of Castiel.

"You gonna get anything?"

He started to shake his head. "I don't-"

"C'mon Cas!" Sam interrupted, "We're here to celebrate. We did save some lives today. Think of that little girl and her family, alive and well because of us!" He smiled.

His brother laughed. "Well, Sam, you're in a good mood today!" He slapped the moose playfully on the back. Then he turned back to Castiel, his face becoming serious.

"Cas. You need to try some pie."

"Pie?"

Dean nodded. "Pie."

"I...I don't need to eat."

The hunter sighed. "Just try some. Please?"

Castiel stared into those pleading eyes and found he was powerless to say no.

"Okay. I will try pie." He said, frowning.

Dean grinned at him and Sam rolled his eyes at them.

After they had ordered, Castiel was starting to have second thoughts. Dean was dangerously excited. He knew the hunter enjoyed pie, but he hadn't known he liked pie this much.

"Cas, you are going to love it!" He beamed at the angel, a happy glint in his eye.

"If you say so, Dean."

When the food arrived, Castiel was sceptical. Pie was some kind of pastry with a fruit filling, he knew. But it did look strange. It was cut into a triangle, and the filling was spilling out. It reminded him a bit of that other food Sam and Dean ate, called pizza.

The angel looked over to Dean, who was hungrily shoveling his pie into his mouth. Castiel decided to copy his movements, picking up a fork and taking a chunk out of his piece. Dean stopped eating to watch him as he put the pie in his mouth.

Castiel's widened as the flavors exploded in his vessel's mouth. He chewed slowly, savoring the flavor.

"This is good Dean." He mumbled and quickly cleared his plate.

Dean laughed, "Good Cas! See Sammy, pie is amazing. Even Cas thinks so." He elbowed his brother in the ribs, and made him choke on his water.

"Dean! I never said I didn't like pie!"

"Yes you did! Remember that one time-"

Castiel smiled as he watched the two brother playfully argue. He offered up a silent prayer to his father, asking him to never let things change.

To let them stay happy, even if it was for a moment.

**Lesson Three is complete! How'd ya'll like it? Good? Bad? Horrid? Tell me. Review please! :3 And join us next time, where Castiel learns how to make toast!**


	4. Lesson Four: The Toaster

Castiel Learns!

Lesson Four: The Toaster

"Dean?" Castiel was in Bobby's living room. Dean prayed to him earlier, saying that he had found something important and needed help.

"Cas. Hey." The hunter nodded at Castiel.

There was an awkward pause.

"You found something?" The angel questioned, shifting uncomfortably.

"That was last week. I prayed to you last week." The disappointment in Dean's eyes was painfully obvious.

"I'm sorry Dean, I hadn't realized." He lied, his eyes lowering to the floor. He knew Dean knew he wasn't telling the truth.

Dean nodded. "I guess you can help with breakfast then!" He grinned and slapped the angel's back, dragging him into Bobby's kitchen.

"I...What? Dean, I can't cook." Castiel said, watching Dean scramble around the kitchen, grabbing pans and boxes and foods out of the fridge. He placed the food on the counters and pans on the stove.

Dean frowned at him, grabbing a carton of eggs from the fridge.

Castiel thought for a moment. "What can I do, Dean?"

The hunter's face broke out in a grin. "That's the spirit!" He cheered.

Castiel's widened and he whipped around, searching for the spirit. Dean groaned, then started to laugh.

"No, Cas, it's just an expression. It means that...that I have a job for you." He pointed to the bread.

"I don't trust you with the stove, so you'll make the toast. It's easy. Just put the bread in and push the lever down. I'm going to wake up Sam."

Castiel glanced uncertainty at the toaster then Dean, back in forth until Dean said, "You got it?"

The angel nodded, turning to the bread. Dean left the room. Castiel found the bread was wrapped in plastic, with a little plastic piece securing it shut.

He pulled at it, trying to take it off gently. He accidentally ripped it off. It went under the microwave.

Surprised, the angel lifted the microwave and used his powers to bring the strange plastic piece to the bread. Once he set the appliance down he turned his attention back to the bread. It was cut into slices, so he took two and gingerly placed them in the toaster slots.

He pushed the levers down just like Dean had said, and waited.

One minute later Dean and Sam heard a shriek coming from the kitchen. Dean's eyes widened and he raced down to the kitchen, Sam at his heels.

"Castiel?"

The angel was on the floor, the toast next to him. He turned to look up at Dean and whispered,

"You didn't tell me they _flew_."

* * *

Bobby had been woken up by Castiel's shriek, and a few minutes he was downstairs grumbling.

"What the hell have you two been doin'-" He cut himself off when he saw Castiel sitting on the sofa, casting nervous glances towards the kitchen.

"Cas? You doin' alright? Ya look like you seen a ghost."

He shook his head, mumbling something.

"What? Speak up, boy." Bobby wasn't in the mood right now.

"It wasn't a ghost." The angel said quietly. "It was toast."

**Haha! :3 I had fun writing this chapter! Thanks to my reviewers and followers! You guys are best. Anywho, as always, open to suggestions! C'mon, I know you got 'em, but I'm not a mind reader! :p**


	5. Lesson Five: Showers Are Off-Limits

Castiel Learns!

Lesson Five: Showers Are Off Limits

Dean was tired of his brother. Sure, he loved him and would never let anything hurt him. But sometimes Sam Winchester was a pain in the ass. All Dean had tried to do was find a hunt for them, to get away from the craziness of all the angel and demon drama.

But _nooo_, sitting around and reading books was just so much better.

After a few minutes of rambling on only for Sam to ignore him, Dean gave up. He decided to go take a shower.

The hunter winced as the hot water found a gash on his thigh. He had cut it earlier, and it hurt like a bitch. Soon the water stopped hurting and Dean relaxed.

"Ahh..." He sighed, leaning into the steaming streams of hot water. He should take hot showers more often, they felt good.

"Hello Dean."

"CAS?! What the hell man?" Dean grabbed the shower curtain and jumped back.

Castiel had appeared right next to him in the shower. He was getting wet, his hair sticking to his face and clothes becoming heavier.

"Dean, Sam said you were hurt. I came to heal you." The angel stared at Dean's face for a moment, before scanning his body for injures. Dean was frozen in shock for a few moments, before a deadly look came across his face.

Dean closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "Cas?"

"Yes Dean?"

"Get out!" Dean roared, grabbing the shampoo bottle and smacking a surprised Castiel on the side of the head.

"Dean, what? I don't unders-"

"Get out! Get out! Get out! GET OOOUUUTTTT!" Dean threw all the soap and his clothes at the angel. He fell back, slipping on the now-wet floor before getting back up.

Castiel dodged the shower rod with ease before he disappeared, reappearing right out side the bathroom.

"Dean!" He called, "I don't understand! Why won't you let me help you?!"

When Dean didn't answer, Castiel frowned.

"Dean?"

"Castiel. Don't you ever do that again! Showers are off limits to angels!" He yelled.

"Why?"

"Because, Cas! It's a human thing!"

"Do you not wish for me to see you naked?"

"Yes!" Dean groaned in frustration.

"Oh."

* * *

In the next room, Sam was snickering.

Castiel was almost too easy to fool sometimes.

**Yay! :3 One last post before school starts again! Pray for me guys, I probably won't come out of Hell unscarred. As usual, open to suggestions! Please R&R!**

**~whovianfangirl**


	6. Lesson Six: It's Your Birthday, Dean!

Castiel Learns!

Lesson Six: It's Your Birthday, Dean.

Today was the day! Dean thought as he hopped out of bed. It was his birthday. Birthdays for the Winchester boys were full of disappointment and longing. John always promised to be there. He never was. So Dean and Sam had decided just to not celebrate them.

Or so he thought.

Outside, sitting in the Impala, Sam and Castiel waited for Dean.

"Sam, are you sure Dean will like this?"

"Yeah, Cas. Stop worrying. Just don't say anything to him."

The angel nodded seriously. "I won't speak to Dean about it."

"Kay. Here he comes. Go, Cas, go!" Sam whisper-yelled. With a fluttering of wings he was gone.

Dean opened door, bag in hand, groggily rubbing his eyes and mid-yawn. He threw his bag in the back of the Impala and hopped in the driver's seat.

"Mornin' Sammy."

"Hey Dean. Sleep alright?"

"Yeah. You?"

"The usual."

"I want some pie."

Sam laughed. "Of course. You driving?"

Dean shot him a look. Sam held up his hands. "Sorry! Geez."

"Thank you, bitch."

"Jerk."

Dean started the car, and they were off.

After awhile, Dean sighed. And sighed again. And again.

"What?!" Sam finially snapped.

"Isn't there something about today?"

"Oh. Your birthday. I know. Happy Birthday, Dean." Sam grinned at him, and Dean laughed and turned his music up louder.

"Dean!" Sam shouted, now annoyed.

* * *

A short while later, they arrived at their destination. The Roadhouse.

The hunters got out of the car and walked in.

"SURPRISE!"

"Ahhhhh!" Dean had his gun out in seconds, which caused laughs through the whole room.

"Happy Birthday, Dean!" Ellen smiled, giving the still surprised Winchester a hug. Cheesy party decorations adorned the room, complete with a confetti parade and a bubble "Happy Birthday" sign hung above the bar. A few of the tables had paper table coverings and on in the front had two very tempting pies.

"Wow...uh, Sammy?" Sam just smiled and shrugged.

"It's a surprise party, Dean." Castiel gave the hunter a stiff, awkward hug. "It is your birthday."

"Uh..." Dean couldn't speak. He'd never had a birthday party since as long as he could remember.

"Wow. Thanks Ellen, Jo. I guess."

"Nuh-uh." Jo put her hands on her hips. "This was all Sam's idea." She smiled at him, then also hugged Dean.

"Sammy. Man, you didn't have to do this. I mean really. I thought we agreed-"

"Screw that Dean. Actually, this was more Cas' idea. I told him it was your birthday and he wanted to throw a party."

The angel agreed. "Yes. Sam told me of your birthday customs and I wanted to celebrate."

Jo giggled. "Okay! Well let's stop sitting around! We've got to party!"

* * *

Hours later, all the humans were passed out. Castiel was left to clean up the mess, which he did willingly. After he was done he stopped to look at Dean. He was sprawled out in a chair. Cas gently lifted him and placed him in a more comfortable position.

Castiel also had something for him, but he never had the chance to earlier. Sam had told him it was customary to give a gift on birthdays. The angel placed a small trinket on the table.

It was a little model of a black '67 Chevy Impala.

* * *

**Aww! Sometimes Cas is just too cute! X3**

**Tomorrow is Misha's birthday! This chapter is deciated to him! I hope you have an amazing 40th birthday Misha! :D**

**Thanks sooo much too all my reviewers, you guys are just so awesome! ^\\.\\^**

**~whovianfangirl**

**8/19/14**


	7. Lesson Seven: Share A Coke

Castiel Learns!

Chapter Seven: Share With Dean

Dean wasn't feeling very well. He lying on the couch, tissues strewn about him and several issues of _Busty Asian Beauties_ in a pile on the floor next to him. Sam was busy researching, so Dean had asked Cas for some pie.

"Cas," He rasped out, "Pie. Pie will help me feel better."

The angel tilted his head. "I do not think that a fruit filled pastry will cure you of this."

Dean groaned and tried to sit up. "Pie cures everything." He flashed Castiel a smile.

Castiel gently pressed Dean back onto the couch. Dean couldn't even sit up. He had a high fever and Castiel was angry he couldn't heal him. He knew how much Dean loved pie, he'd even tried some himself. After thinking for a moment, the angel gave in.

"Alright Dean. I will get you a pie." As he turned around to leave, Dean grabbed the hem of his trenchcoat..

"Cas." He whipped around.

"Yes Dean?"

"Money...on the table."

"Thank you. I won't be long."

Dean smiled to himself as he listened to the angel fly away.

Castiel appeared in front a a discount store and pushed the doors open. A little bell rang but the clerk didn't look up from his magazine. Cas looked around for pie. He spotted a rack near the back of the store.

Aunt Annie's Cherry Pies, it read. There was only one left, and someone else was eyeing it. Castiel swiftly snatched the pie off the shelf. He started to make his way towards the clerk, something caught his eye.

"Share a Coke with Dean." He said out loud as he read the side of a Coke can.

Other drinks around it had other people's names, but Castiel ignored them as he re-read it.

_Share a Coke with Dean._

He picked it up.

The clerk startled when Castiel banged down the pie and coke on the counter.

"Hey! Man! Do you mind?"

"No." Castiel placed a twenty dollar bill on top of the pie container. "I'd like to buy these."

The clerk grumbled to himself as he rang up the items.

"Here." He threw the change at Castiel who caught it with ease and promptly walked out.

"Dean! Dean!" The angel called. "I have pie."

The hunter, who was just nodding off to sleep, jerked up and grinned.

"Thanks, man. You're the best." He eagerly took the pie from Castiel's hands and began eating with with his hands. Sam looked up from his laptop, and wished he hadn't.

"Ew, Dean that's disgusting!"

"Hut up ham." He mumbled, a small chunk of partially chewed pie landed on his shirt. He picked it off and put it right back into his mouth.

"I also bought this." Castiel handed Dean the coke after he finished the slice of pie.

Dean laughed as he read it. "I've seen these," He said, "They started doing this awhile ago. I've been on the lookout for one with my name. Thanks again, Cas."

"You're welcome Dean."

After a second of silence Dean spoke up again.

"Wanna share?" He offered the coke can to Cas.

"No thank you. I do not need food nor drink."

"Aw, c'mon. Are you sure at least that Jimmy guy will like it?"

Castiel contemplated this for a second before Dean handed him a cup from the table.

As the angel drank, Dean gave him a smile that made his stomach flutter.

Sam peeked over his laptop again and muttered something with a snicker.

"Gay."

* * *

**Chapter completed! Huzzah! My friend Heather inspired this, so thank you best friend! **

**Sorry I haven't updated in a bit. Been a little busy! :p**

**Hope you enjoyed it! I particularly liked writing this one.**

**~whovianfangirl**

**9/5/14**


	8. Lesson Eight: Google

_Castiel Learns!_

_Lesson Eight: Google_

Castiel was an angel. He had his own ways of getting information. So when Sam had asked if he'd ever used a computer, he wasn't really sure how to respond.

"Excuse me?" He blinked and kind of just stood there.

"Computer, Cas. Man, how do you get your stuff?" The hunter closed his laptop and sat back.

Castiel didn't answer and continued to stare at Sam, a blank expression on his face. Sam cleared his throat twice before he sighed.

"Oooohhhh-kaaaayyyyyy. I guess not then." Sam muttered.

"I do not think you would like my answer."

There was another awkward silence. It seemed to stretch out for hours upon hours, Castiel and Sam just staring until Sam looked away.

He coughed and opened his laptop.

"Dean!" He yelled, and a very annoyed hunter stumbled into the room.

"What, Sammy? I was sleeping. Oh, hi Cas." Dean said as he noticed his friend.

"I...uh...here." Sam shoved his laptop at his brother. "Teach Cas how to use this. I...I have to go. Books. Yep. Lots of books to read." With that Sam promptly cleared the room.

"Who tied his panties in a knot?" Dean snorted and turned to Cas.

"So...Cas...what just happened?"

* * *

After Castiel gave Dean a very detailed description of the past few minutes, they sat down on the table.

"You know, you don't have to learn this."

Castiel nodded. "I understand. But it may prove to be useful later."

Dean shrugged and turned the laptop on. "Alright, man. Let's do this."

The screen flickered to life and Dean logged in. Of course he knew the password. He knew his Sammy better than anything.

The password was_ imnotamoose_.

Castiel raised his brow but said nothing.

"Okay...logged in...and...Google!"

"What?"

"Google, man. The search engine thingie. You type in stuff...and you get more...stuff..." He trailed off as the angel continued to stare blankly.

"I'll just..uhm...Sammy!" Dean yelled and turned his head towards the door. "I need your geek!"

The tall hunter appeared in the door way, and he was not amused.

"Not a geek." He grumbled, folding his arms and leaning over Dean to look at the laptop screen.

"What?" Sam snapped.

"Explain Google."

Castiel stepped off to the side a bit to make room for Sam.

The moose sighed. "Google is a multi-billion dollar company-"

"No!" Dean interrupted. "Google." He tapped his finger against the screen.

Sam sighed again. "I'll use small words. You type in shit and you get results for what you typed in. There." Sam shoved Dean out of the way and typed in 'gay porn', pressed enter, and got the hell out of there.

He slid out of the door, down the hallway and locked himself in the bathroom.

"SAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMMMYYYYYY!" Dean screamed. "NOT COOL DUDE!"

When Sam didn't hear banging on the door, he burst into a full-blown laughing fit.

* * *

Sam had locked himself away and Dean had slammed the laptop shut and stormed off, leaving a very confused Castiel all by himself. The laptop was still on the table, so he sat down and opened it back up.

He blinked at the images of men making love, a blush started creeping up on his face, and then he suddenly smote the laptop.

It was now nothing but a small pile of ash on the table.

Sam and Dean rushed back into the room from all the noise, but all they found was that small pile of ash and a little note that said;

_I don't like computers. Never use them in my presence again._

* * *

**Please give a round of applause to ShriQuinn for suggesting this chappie! :D **

**Truthfully, this one kind of got out of hand. When I write, the second my fingers hit the keyboard it's like they have a mind of their own. And then, _ta-dah_! A fanfiction is born! **

**So, yeah. That's all. As always, I hope you liked it! And a big thanks to all who take the time to review! You guys keep me going!**

**~whovianfangirl**

**9/7/14**


	9. Lesson Nine: Shopping?

_Castile Learns!_

_Lesson Nine; Shopping...Sort Of_

Dean didn't even really remember why he was here. Sammy, maybe. Or was it Cas? It didn't really matter.

Because right now he was gaping at his angel friend, who had just walked right into _Victoria's Secret_ unblinking.

Wait, you're probably a bit confused. Let's go back to this morning. Dean had just gotten dressed, Sammy already up on his laptop.

"Have you been up all night, Sammy?" Dean asked, digging through a paper bag on the table that had the Tastee's logo.

"Yeah. I had coffee." He replied, mumbling, nodding his head towards the side, where an empty coffee cup stood.

"Kay!" Dean said, stuffing his face with warm glaze donuts.

Then he looked up. "Hey, they have a pretty decent shopping mall here, and they have an Apple store. I was thinking about buying an iPad or something." Sam didn't really seem tired, and he seemed to really want to go. He had his puppy dog eyes on, and Dean just couldn't tell his Sammy no.

"Alright." Dean took the bag of donuts and headed towards the Impala, still happily munching on the donuts. After a few minutes Sam got up from the table, closed his laptop, and locked the door behind him.

He slid into the passenger seat just as Dean crumpled up the paper bag and threw it out the window.

"Dean!" He groaned, "How many times have I told you to stop littering!"

"What?" His brother grinned, "I'm not going to trash up my baby."

"Then get a garbage bag or something."

"No."

"Jerk."

"Bitch."

* * *

After a few minutes of arguing which ways to turn, Dean pulled into the parking lot of a mall. Sam hopped out.

"You coming in?"

Dean thought for a moment, then just shrugged and got out, locking his car.

"Sure. Why not?"

Then a familiar voice came from behind him.

"Hello, Dean."

The hunter whirled around. "Cas! Man, stop doing that!"

The angel was used to this response by now. "Why are you at a shopping center, Dean?"

"Why are you at a shopping center, Cas?" Dean shot back, very much annoyed at the angel.

"I..." Castiel was confused. Dean's voice had a hint of hostility to it.

"It doesn't matter. Sammy, I-" The hunter turned around, but Sam wasn't there.

"Sammy?"

"I believe he want inside." Castiel said and pointed to the glass doors that led to the mall. Dean nodded.

"Is he okay?"

"I do not sense any supernatural presence in the building."

"You wanna get some pie?"

"Yes."

* * *

Dean led Castiel around the mall, searching for the food court. He didn't know where it was, and he sure as hell wasn't going to read any of the various maps around the mall.

"I've never been in a shopping centre before." Castiel was saying, but Dean turned his head to check out a girl who had just passed him. When the hunter turned back to point her out to Castiel, his eyes nearly popped out of his head.

"Shit."

Castiel was heading straight for the forbidden zone. Victoria's Secret, a lingerie store. That was not okay to do unless you had a girl with you.

"Cas! No! Come back!" Dean charged after his friend, trying to ignore the little squeals and insults around him.

"Eep!"

"Pervert!"

"He's kinda hot."

"What the hell?!"

The angel was in the far left corner of the store, and was holding a silky black bra up to his chest. Dean felt a blush on his face as he threw the bra down and dragged Castiel out of the store.

"Dean?"

"Cas, you don't go into places like that!"

"Why not, Dean?"

"Because! It's a human thing. You don't just wander in places like that! Damnit, Cas! There's rules!"

"Oh." Castiel looked at his feet. "I apologize, Dean. I did not mean to upset you."

Dean's laughter sounded a bit forced. "Don't apologize to me. I think you should say sorry to all those chicks. Now c'mon. We've got some pie to eat."

* * *

"Damn it. It didn't work." Sam muttered from behind a rack of bras in Victoria's Secret.

Suddenly the bras were whipped aside and a clerk was glaring at him.

"Sir, please stop hiding behind our merchandise."

* * *

**Yay! I think this is one of my favourites! :3 **

**This was sort of requested by a guest, Vanity dean. Huzzah! :D I am having so much fun with this story and I am overwhelmed by all the feedback I'm getting! Thank you so, so, so so sosososososososososososo much! I love you guys! X3**

**~whovianfangirl**

**9/9/14**


	10. Lesson Ten: Ring Around Roses

_Castiel Learns!_

_Lesson Ten: Ring of Roses_

"Hey Cas! Get your ass down here. Me and Sammy need another player. It's no fun with two people!" Dean whined out a prayer, hoping his angel had his listening ears on.

He and Sammy were sitting across from each other at a table, one shot glass lined up and a bunch of different bottles of various beers behind it.

It took a second for the angel to get there, he appeared and sat down on the opposite side of the table.

"Hello, Dean. Sam."

"Hey Cas." Sam waved a bit, but Dean launched right into a explanation.

"So, Cas, we have nothing to do at the moment, so I thought we'd play Ring of Roses!" His face was lit up in an happy smile, but Castiel said nothing, so Dean continued, "Here's how you play. I'll start." He poured some beer into the shot glass.

"Okay. I drink it, then hand it to Cas," Dean pushed the shot glass and open bottle towards the angel. "Who is going to take a shot, then so on."

The angel nodded, and drowned his shot in a second.

"We're playing with beer because Sammy didn't want to go get something stronger." Dean gave his brother a sour look, and Sam rolled his eyes and took his shot.

"So we continue doing this until what?" Castiel asked as he watch a stray drop of beer travel down Dean's neck.

"Until we're plastered." Dean answered.

Dean was so busy talking to Cas, he didn't notice that Sam wasn't drinking anything. He just pretended to pour and down an empty shot glass. He was sure the angel had noticed, but thankfully didn't say anything about it.

About thirty minutes later, Dean and Castiel had consumed about seven bottles between them. Dean was feeling tipsy, but the angel showed no signs of slowing down.

"Heeeyyy. Cas, I know angelss have high tolerances, but this is ridiculous!" His voice slurred slightly.

"I will either need something much stronger or larger amounts of beer." Cas replied.

"I have some liquor or something in here!" Sam pulled out a bottle of something neither Dean nor Was had seen before.

Dean snatched it away from Sam and poured Cas a shot.

"Drink!" He ordered.

So he did. And the angel's eyes widened and he almost spit out the liquid. This was 90% acholol! Cas tried to warn Dean, but it was too late. He'd already had some.

"Wheew! This shit is strooong!" Dean sang after the burn of the drink left his throat.

"Dean, please hand that to me." Cas reached for the bottle.

"No! Go get your own!" The hunter stood up and stumbled quickly across the room, sticking his tongue out at the angel. Sam giggled and sat back to watch.

"Dean, please. That's not good for you! It's-"

Dean took another swig. "Did I ever tell you that I like your face?"

"Dean! Give me the bottle!" Castiel was annoyed. He was about to use his powers when Dean let the bottle slip out of his hands and shatter on the floor.

"Noooo! Francine!" Dean cried, and stared at the broken bottle on the floor. Cas stopped chasing him, and instantly clean up the floor so Dean wouldn't step on the glass.

"Cas...you killed Francine."

"You dropped it, Dean."

Dean looked up at Cas, and to his surprise, had tears in his eyes.

"She was so young."

"Dean..." The angel didn't really know what to say.

"She was so young..." Dean cried and wrapped his arms around Cas.

"Dean, it's okay. Don't cry. It was just a bottle." He patted the hunter's back awkwardly.

"Okay..." Dean smiled up at Cas. "You know, have I ever told you that I like your face?"

* * *

**I wrote this one for Xion5, who requested I have Cas learn a drinking game. I hope you liked it! **

**And yay! This is lesson ten! :D I'm so happy I've gotten this far! Again, thank you guys! :)**

**~whovianfangirl**

**9/10/14**


	11. Lesson Eleven: Family

Castiel Learns!

Lesson Eleven: Family

Castiel sat alone in the almost empty restaurant. The angel was occupying a booth close to the door, with a full view of the little room packed with tables and chairs. He was waiting for the Winchesters, who had asked him to come here.

There were running a few minutes late. The angel didn't worry, humans tended to be late.

The bell attached to the door jingled cheerily. Castiel turned to see a little girl skip in, her mother walking calmly behind her.

"Table for two, please." The woman said to the hostess on duty.

"Can we have a booth, mummy?"

"Sure, Lily."

The woman and Lily slid into the both in front of Castiel, and he listened to the seemingly mindless chatter of the little girl. It was voice of an innocent, yearning to learn more about the world around her. Her mother answered selomdly, letting the girl ramble on as she looked over the menu.

"Mummy, why is that man sitting alone? Where's his family?" The angel was surprised at the girl, whose voice was layered thickly with concern.

"I don't know honey. Why don't you ask him?" Came her mother's tired voice.

Suddenly a little head full of strawberry blonde curls poked up from under the table.

"Hey mister! Whatcha doin' all alone?"

"I'm waiting for someone."

"Oohh. So you're not all by yourself?"

"No."

She jumped into the other side of the booth, smiling as she continued to bounce on the cushions.

"What's your name?" Lily asked, pouring some salt out on the table and pushed it around.

"Casitel. What's yours?" He asked simply to amuse her.

"I'm Lily!" She beamed proudly. "It was my Nana's name!"

A little smile formed on Castiel's face at the childish pride in her voice.

"I think that's a beautiful name. Lilies are pretty flowers." He said, his usually gruff voice softened.

She clapped and giggled. "My daddy says that when he comes to visit."

"Your father? Where is he?"

"Oh, he works lots so me and mummy don't get to see him much."

"I see."

Castiel truly saw. Her little heart hurt when she talked about her daddy being away, and he understood that little spark of pain perfectly.

"You know, my Father is gone too."

Castiel was certainly not expecting the short arms that wrapped around his neck as Lily leaned over the table.

"Don't be sad, Cas-tee-elle. My daddy visits me, so yours is gonna too!" She said it with such certainty the angel half believed her. "And I have my mummy! Don't you have family?"

Castiel loved his brothers and sisters. He really did. But even so, they weren't truly family. Family was a human concept the angel was struggling to understand. Your family cared for you, and you spent time with them.

You put their lives and happiness above yours, and protected them no matter what.

The closest thing Castiel had to that was Dean. Maybe even Sam.

The bell jingled again and in walked the hunters themselves.

Castiel turned to Lily and said,

"That's my family."

Lily gasped and jumped up.

"Hi Cas-tee-elle's family!" She chirped, waving at the hunters.

* * *

"Dean, you seeing this man?" Sam whispered to his brother.

"Yeah. I didn't know Cas went for the young ones like that." Dean whispered back.

"I can hear you." The angel said after he told Lily to go back to her mother.

On the outside, Castiel was unreadable as the brothers sat down across from him. Inwardly, he smiled. He was finally with his family again.

* * *

**A/N: This one gave me feels. I decided to write at least one like this, it can't be all fluff, mind you. This is Supernatural.**

**Anywho, I can't really think of anything else I need to say...besides that your reviews are what keep me going! :3 You guys are amazing!**

**~whovianfangirl**

**9/14/14**


	12. Lesson Twelve: Salad

_Castiel Learns!_

_Lesson Twelve: Salads_

Never in his life had Dean Winchester been so disgusted. Well, maybe that was a lie. Right now it felt like it, though.

Sam had fallen asleep somehow with his salad dinner all over him. Partially chewed lettuce and cheese were falling out of his snoring mouth, while tomatoes and the rest of the lettuce were on his chest and the floor.

"Ew, gross Sammy." He muttered and poked his brother's forehead. "Wake up, man. Oh God, this is just sick."

Sam made a whiny sound and swatted Dean's hand away.

Frustrated, the hunter did the first thing he thought of.

"Cas! Caaass! Please, I need your help."

"What is it, Dean? What's wrong?" Castiel was there instantly, with a flurry of wings and fear in his eyes.

"Cas, wake him up. I just can't touch him."

The angel visibly relaxed and sighed. "Dean, please don't worry me like that in the future."

Dean huffed and crossed his arms defensively.

"Hey, this is very serious, if that where you're getting at. Please, just wake him up. This is so gross." He looked away from his brother and pressed a closed fist against his mouth. Dean's eyes were closed and his face was scrunched up.

Castiel, noticing that the spilled food was bothering his friend, waved his hand and it was gone.

"Is that better, Dean?"

Dean opened one eye, then the other.

"Yeah. Thanks Cas. I can't handle that sometimes."

Behind them, Sam's eyes fluttered open. When he saw Dean and Cas talking, he quickly shut his eyes again.

"Do you not like vegetables?" The angel titled his head to the side in his signature confused manner.

"I don't know, Cas! I just...don't trust rabbit food. It tastes horrible and I don't understand why Sammy likes it so much."

"Why does lettuce and vegetables make you feel ill? You eat them on hamburgers."

"Because I they just do!" Dean was aware that he was acting like a child, but was too annoyed to care.

He nodded politely, not really understanding but not wanting to make Dean upset. After a few minutes of quiet, Sam "woke up". He yawned loudly and stretched his arms, standing up.

Dean cleared his throat and took a couple of steps away from the angel.

"What happened to my salad?"

Castiel narrowed his eyes at the tall hunter. "I took care of it. You spilled it."

Sam nodded, and Dean rushed towards the door. He grabbed the Impala's keys and walked out.

"I'm going out."

Castiel turned to Sam.

"Why does he strongly dislike salads?"

Sam started laughing. "It's a long story. I'll try to be brief." The hunter sat back down in his chair.

"Dean and I were still kids, I was about seven and he was about twelve. Dad was on a hunt, and we weren't allowed outside. The only food we had was running out, and all that was left was big bowl of salad. We had no choice but to eat it, and we both got horribly sick after."

Sam paused to take a swig of water from a bottle on the table.

"As it turned out," the moose continued, "The thing Dad was hunting cause severe illness and nausea. It had found us and that was it's attempt at killing us. But even knowing that, Dean still has a deep distrust of salads."

Castiel nodded again, this time understanding.

"You should go after him, make sure he's okay." Sam suggested, and before he knew it the angel had flown away.

Sam grinned and pulled open his laptop. If this wouldn't help Dean and Cas realize how deep their bond was, Sam was going to have to get a whole lot smarter.

* * *

**A/N: I saw a Tumblr post this morning, and Dean was saying "Another reason to not trust salads!" And this popped into my head! :3 **

**I find his dislike of salads so funny, I sometimes find myself choosing hamburgers instead of salad a lot more than I used to. :/ Is that a good thing?**

**Okay, this is a head's up! I won't be updating as much as I have been. I think I've spoiled you all, typing up chapters so fast! :p But don't worry, the max will be at least two weeks. I promise I won't let I get past that mark.**

**So...bye for now! *waves***

**~ whovianfangirl**

**9/15/14**


	13. Lesson Thirteen: Sickness

Castiel Learns!

Lesson Thirteen: Sickness

Dean was freaking out. One minute, he and Sammy were just chilling out in the bunker, talking, beer in hand.

The next minute, Sam is sprawled out on the floor, unconscious. His long limbs were awkwardly spread out, and the glass beer bottle had shattered, cutting his right hand. Warm, red blood oozed lazily out of the small cuts.

"Sammy!" Dean cried, pulling his brother's head onto his lap. "C'mon man, wake up! Sammy!"

Acting on instinct, but not truly thinking, Dean wrapped up the bleeding hand quickly and dragged his brother's large body to the closest bedroom, which happened to be his.

"Please wake up!" With difficulty, Dean lifted Sam up onto the bed and checked his pulse. It was steady, but Dean wasn't satisfied, not in the least.

"Cas!" He looked to the ceiling. "Cas! Please get down here! It's Sammy...I don't know what's wrong with him!" Dean was panicking, but he couldn't help it.

Sammy was hurt and all he could think was 'Cas can help.'

"Dean. What's happened?"

"Oh thank God." Dean grabbed the angel and pushed him towards Sammy. "What's wrong with him?"

Castiel scanned the tall hunter's body.

"He is just asleep, Dean. I do not understand. Why are you so upset?"

"Asleep?" Dean let loose a breath he didn't know he was holding. "Oh. Well, he sort of just passed out."

"I see." Castiel touched his index and middle finger to Sam's for head.

"He should wake up in a little while. I healed the cut for you."

"Thanks man. I though he was...I dunno...dying or something." Dean ran a hand through his spiky hair, a grimace on his face. It soon melted into a smile when he turned to the angel.

"I'm going to go make some soup for Sammy...do you want to watch of something? Cause I'm sorry dude, but after the toaster thing I am not letting you help in the kitchen." The hunter had an amused smile.

"I'll watch."

"Okay. Off to the kitchen we go!"

* * *

Needless to say, Cas did help with the cooking. Dean had to make another small pot of soup.

"Cas, how the hell did you manage to burn the carrots? I only asked you to fricking chop them." Dean scowled as he gently carried a steaming bowl of chicken soup towards Sam's room.

He opened the door to find Sam up and reading.

"You're up, man!" Dean grinned. "I made you some soup!"

"Oh! Thanks Dean...and Cas?" Sam smiled.

"I burnt the carrots." Castiel informed him.

"Okay..."

"Here! Sit and enjoy!" Dean gave the bowl to Sam who hungrily started eating.

"Whoa, take it slow, Sammy. I know my cooking is irresistible, but you wouldn't want to get sick from it."

His brother rolled his eyes and continued to devour the soup.

When he finished he fell back on his pillows and closed his eyes.

"You can leave now. I'm sleepy." Sam mumbled.

"C'mon Cas." Dean dragged the angel out of the room.

Behind them, one of Sam's eyes peeked at them and he grinned.

"I hope Dean finally grows a pair." He laughed.

* * *

**A/N: I don't really have much to say today but thank you so much for following and reviewing my story! It means so much to me! :3**

**~whovianfangirl**

**9/23/14**


	14. Lesson Fourteen: Sleep

_Castiel Learns!_

_Lesson Fourteen: Sleep_

Castiel had learned about a group of demons in New York. They were planning an attack, and a big one. It would take place in three weeks, and the angel knew he needed his friend's help.

He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and called Dean's current number.

"Ugh...hello?" Came a groggy, tired voice.

"Dean, I have news. Where are you?"

"Cas? Damn, man it's three in the morning! Couldn't this wait?" The hunter snapped. When Castiel didn't respond, he sighed.

"We're in New Orleans, some hotel uhm...called the...Rosa...Crown? Room eighteen."

Castiel flew there and found a sleepy Dean, his hair was ruffled and the blanket was on the floor, revealing his grey tee shirt and boxers.

He rubbed his eyes and groaned, sitting up. Dean pointed to Sam's bed and indicated for them to be quiet.

"This better be important," he said, "because I just got to sleep."

Castiel knew humans needed many hours of sleep, about eight. Dean normally got around four. And if he had just gone to bed, Castiel had interrupted his fragile sleeping schedule.

"In three weeks there will be a major demon attack in central New York."

Dean wanted to scream, but that would wake up Sammy.

"Three weeks? Cas, that's not an emergency."

He flopped back down on the bed and pulled the comforter back over him. The blanket was still warm, and he muzzled back down with his face on the pillow.

"Come back in the morning." Dean muttered.

"But Dean-"

"Cas, either go away or lie down with me."

The bed shifted as the angel climbed on, and Dean tensed up.

"What are you doing?"

Castiel was confused, "You told me either to leave or lie down, so I chose the latter."

Dean groaned and turned over so that he was facing Cas. He wasn't expecting his face to be mere inches away from his, and scooted back a little.

"I was being sarcastic."

"Oh." Dejected, Castiel started to get up, but Dean grabbed his shoulder.

"You can stay, if you want..." He mumbled, a small blush tinting his cheeks.

"Okay." Castiel burrowed down into the blankets as Dean dozed. He didn't sleep, of course, but that was to be expected, so he watched Dean's sleeping face, and he showed indications of nightmares. Castiel stopped them and replaced them with happy memories.

* * *

Sam woke up just before dawn, and stumbled out of bed. He went to the bathroom and when he came back, noticed someone else was in Dean's bed.

He picked up a knife from the table and held it. Cautiously, he crept towards the bed until he could see who-or what- it was.

"Cas?" He breathed, relief replaced by a naughty sort of joy.

Dean and Cas were in the same bed. Even though he finally was seeing it, Sam was also kind of disgusted. That was his brother and an angel.

He slowly backed out of the room, a huge grin never left his face.

Finally, was all he could think. Finally.

* * *

**A/N: Over four thousand views! X3 Ohmigosh! Yaay! Thank all of you for sticking with this!**

**I am still open for suggestions or requests if anyone has them, it's been awhile!**

**~ whovianfangirl**

**9/24/14**


	15. Lesson Fifteen: Plushies

_Castiel Learns!_

_Lesson Fifteen: Plushies_

Dean and Sam were investigating a man who owned a toy shop in Missouri. Reports of bodies found with no blood and chewed up necks had attracted their interest. They thought he was a vampire, but it turned out to be nothing but a bunch of cosplayers taking it to the extreme.

While Dean was in the toy shop, he saw a small pile of stuffed animals and waved them off with a laugh. Sam, however, picked up a few and hid them in his duffle bag.

Now they were in the car, with Dean complaining and Sam trying to ignore him.

"It sucks that we had to drive all the way out here for nothing. I just want a good hunt. Is that too much to ask for?!"

"Hey Dean." Sam said as he flipped through some newspapers.

"What?" He snapped.

"Shut up."

Dean snorted and turned up the music.

Suddenly a small squirrel stuffed animal with button eyes was shoved into Dean's lap.

"What the-" He stopped the car, and picked up the plushie.

"I took some...because you know, they reminded me of a certain "King"." Sam used air quotes.

"Really, Sam?" Dean sighed. He was not a squirrel. Like Crowley had called Sam a moose, one time he had called Dean a squirrel. Dean's personal favorite nickname the demon had came up with was "Not-Moose".

"Crowley never did name Cas anything so I picked this one!" Sam eagerly pulled something out of the duffle.

Dean suddenly found himself face to face with an owl plushie with a stoic expression and wide blue eyes. The likeness to the angel was almost unnerving, and he quickly batted it away.

"That does not look like Cas." He informed Sam.

"What?!" Sam's smirk fell. "Of course it does, that_ is_ Cas!"

"Why do you keep repeating my name?" Castiel had flown into the back seat. It was a good thing Dean had stopped the car, because he startled and his hand slipped. The Impala's horn was the only sound for an awkward few seconds.

"Jesus Christ Cas! How many times have I told you to stop that!" Dean yelled, snatching his hand away from the steering wheel.

Sam handed Cas the owl plushie.

"Does that look like you?" He asked.

The angel studied the owl for a good minute and a half before giving it back to Sam.

"No."

Sam sighed. "I mean your vessel."

Castiel became confused, "This vessel is not anything like that...what is it?"

The tall hunter held up the plushie.

"It's an owl stuffed animal...It's a toy."

"A toy?" Cas reached for it again and ran his fingers over the soft surface. "How does one use it?"

Sam groaned, and Dean was barely holding in his laughter.

"Kids use their imagination and play with them, but sometimes they sleep with them."

Castiel raised a brow at that statement. "Children have sexual intercouse with these?"

"Oh!" Sam gasped,not expecting that at all, "No no no! Not like that man, ew." He turned to his brother. "Dude, what have you been teaching him?"

Dean, who was blushing slightly, shrugged.

Cas spoke up again. "Is this like a comfort object?"

Sam hastily nodded. "Yeah...a comfort object..."

"Do you like it?" Dean piped up. Castiel turned to look at him.

"It is pleasing, yes. The stuffed owl feels...soft." He petted it one more time, as if to prove his statement. Its short, fuzzy faux fur was a light brown, with white speckles on the little wings.

"You can keep it, if you want." Sam offered. "But where would you keep it?"

The angel opened his trenchcoat and gently placed the plushie in a pocket.

"It can stay here."

Dean smiled, and made a mental note to himself.

_Angels like plushies. Who would've thought it?_

* * *

**A/N: I've been getting ideas like crazy lately! It's insane! X3**

**I thought this one was extra extra cute! :D Cas with plushies is one of my favorite things! **

**~whovianfangirl**

**9/25/14**


	16. Lesson Sixteen: Dating?

_Castiel Learns!_

_Lesson Sixteen: Dating_

Castiel was in a park. Somewhere in Arizona, he recalled, but his mind was otherwise occupied at the moment. He was studying humans in their element. What better place to do this but in a park? Children with their parents, the elderly and smart ones playing chess, and couples out on dates.

The couples peaked his interest the most. Most of the smiles were forced, and kissing was a common occurrence. Squeezing each other's hands, subtly brushing against one another, and light hearted looks. The angel was struggling to comprehend why the humans were doing these sorts of things.

'Maybe it's part of their mating ritual?' He sighed. That did not sound quite right. Dean would know, he did a lot of mating with human women.

Castiel grabbed his cell and dialed the hunter's number.

"Hey Cas. What's up?" The angel could hear the smile on Dean's face. Castiel decided not to respond to his question, thinking it would be better to get straight to the point.

"I want to know more about the human mating ritual."

The angel's demand was met by surprised sputtering and gasping.

"W-What?"

"I said I want to learn more about-"

"I h-heard you, man." Dean interrupted. "But why the sudden question?" He waited in vain for an answer, but then Dean got and idea.

"Did you meet a chick? Is she hot?"

"No, I have not met and warm chicken offspring."

"A girl. Woman. Female. God's gift to man." The hunter was not longer amused.

"I have not met any females today."

"Then why are you asking?" Dean leaned against the table, Sam behind him typing away on his laptop.

"Hey." Sam poked his brothers back. "Who's that?" He whispered.

"Cas."

"Oh." Sam nodded, but was unable to return to his research. He propped up his elbow and rested his hand on his hand, closing his eyes. This conversation was sure to be interesting.

"Is Sam there?" Castiel asked.

"Yeah, but answer my question. Why?"

The angel looked around the park, and locked eyes with a brown eyed girl, who sniffed and turned away to throw her arms around her boyfriend.

"I am observing humans at the park and I am confused as to why there are so many pairs of humans."

Dean laughed softy, and shook his head.

"Cas, they are probably on dates. You know...uhm..." He trailed off, not knowing the right word.

"Courting?" Sam offered.

"Yeah," Dean nodded. "Courting."

Castiel made a small 'o' with his mouth. "So they go on these 'dates' before having sexual intercourse."

Dean froze and tensed up. "Cas! Man, you make it sound so...so...just...argh!" Dean threw up his hands in frustration and slammed the phone shut.

Sam bit his lip in a vain attempt to hold back his laughter as his brother stalked off, fuming, to his car.

As soon as the door shut Sam howled, grabbing his aching stomach. "AHHHAAAHAAH!" He screamed, banging his hand on the table. "Oh my God!" Tears streamed down his face as he barely heard Dean yell at him.

"Shut the fuck up Sammy!"

* * *

Castiel frowned as the phones disconnected. He never really got his answer. Disgruntled, he scanned the sidewalk for young couples. The angel spotted one, and they were just about to pass him.

"Sebastian! That's not funny!" A girl squealed as she giggled, playfully hitting the boy walking to her left.

Castiel stepped in front of them.

"Excuse me, can you tell me what 'dates' are?"

* * *

**A/N: Omg I am sooo sorry this is late! T^T I started a new school and I just found out my dad is moving to Missouri! Those are pretty good excuses, right?! Right?! **

**This chapter was requested by Xion5. You totally rock! :3**

**I love all of you and thank you so much for reading my little fic!**

**With sincerest apologies,**

**~ whovianfangirl**

**10/7/14**


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